Do You Feel It?

Woke to "It's the Climb"

This has been a heck of a week for me energetically. Sunday is the Solar Eclipse. I always feel these planetary build ups. I am not always knowing that they are related to the energies working their way through me. Today I KNOW it. It is a challenge to stay present and surrendered. Aspects of my self are screaming (I don't want to be here!) and are calmed and released by I AM even if only momentarily. I (i) cannot control. I am once again not knowing who I am. Some say this is a good thing and I believe that to be true. It comes on me as an aha..."I don't know who I am anymore." Aspects of self are afraid of this. Other aspects are peaceful about it. I breathe and release the conflict.

My intention is to keep walking forward feet planted deeply. This is like child birth. There is no going back. It's all in there and it wants out. I AM assisting with every breath.

Keep climbing,
Brenda

Awareness of Awareness

Writing Down My Soul, Day 16
Body of Consciousness, Day 13

My body is tired today.

I had lovely guests for lunch yesterday to help me celebrate July 4th. I intended to stay aware of myself during the visit. Most of the time I was that director behind the camera watching. I did pretty well with it. I reviewed the experience after all had gone and saw where additional detachment is needed on my part.

What does that mean? Noticing. Noticing triggers. Noticing judgments and how the ego tries to jump in there in my head in the old, habitual way. I experienced standing back and watching on one level, while feeling and thinking on another level. Jeesh, no wonder, I get confused (but less so, with this practice). So much going on. But it's really cool to be over here and over here and over there; all in the same place. Somehow I feel and know this is all coming together to be ME; the REAL me.

Today, I rest, balance, acclimate.
Brenda